


Super Hero

by Rukana382



Category: Melody (Musician), Miyavi (Musician), the GazettE
Genre: Anal Sex, Drama, F/M, M/M, Pregnancy, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2015-08-01
Packaged: 2018-04-12 08:23:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4472219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rukana382/pseuds/Rukana382
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He loved the man so much and yet he had pushed him away. He knew in his heart that it was wrong but he had done it anyways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

It was the most stupid thing in the world to fight over and yet, they had. He regretted it now because he didn’t have the one he truly cared about at his side. He regretted every single word he had said to him because he knew it wasn’t true; how could it have been true? He loved the man so much and yet he had pushed him away. He knew in his heart that it was wrong but he had done it anyways. He couldn’t even remember what they had been fighting about. But it was definitely too late now to apologize. He knew that he had hurt his feelings gravely and broken the man’s heart. He would probably never be able to forgive himself and he wouldn’t blame his love if he didn’t either. He was being a total jerk that night and he knew it.

He sighed as he looked out of the window, watching the rain droplets drip down the glass slowly. “Kai…” He whispered out to the cold glass in the quiet of the room. A soft female voice called out to him from another room. “Honey… Miyavi… come to bed, sweetie.” He closed his eyes as he heard her voice. He sighed and hoisted himself up from his seat on the window sill. “Coming Melody, dear.” He called back to her quietly as he walked out of the living room and back to her bedroom. His life with her was a façade and he knew it… He didn’t know what to do anymore. He would think about it in the morning.


	2. Shame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He hoped that she wasn’t coming back until late because he didn’t want to look at her face because it reminded him of his shame.

He awoke the next day in a haze, having slept only a few hours and having dreams of _him_ didn’t help him one bit. He wanted to turn back time, but that was impossible. He wiped at his eyes, keeping unshed tears in check. He looked to his side to see that Melody was gone. ‘She must be out shopping today…’ he thought to himself as he got up and stretched.  He walked into the bathroom and decided to take a shower, hoping that would help when it only made his depressed state seep deeper into his skin and soul. He got dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a black tank top, pulling on a pair of white shoes as he walked into her room.  He hoped that she wasn’t coming back until late because he didn’t want to look at her face because it reminded him of his shame. Quietly, he grabbed his keys, phone, bag, and sunglasses and left her place, making sure to lock the door on his way out. He needed some fresh air to clear his head of thoughts of what he could have had…

He had found a little café in town where he could sit in peace and have a latte and bask in the warmth of the sun’s rays.  He took out his phone and played a little bit of Tetris on it before he got bored of that and stretched out in his chair with his arms behind his head. He heard some sort of ruckus coming from a ways down the street and when he turned, he saw a group of guys just horsing around and having fun. The closer they got, the more familiar they looked until it dawned on him who they were: the GazettE themselves out to have a good day together for once. Ruki, the short brown haired vocalist, was getting a piggy back ride from the black haired second guitarist, Aoi.

Uruha, the slender honey blonde main guitarist, was picking at the black and blonde haired bassist named Reita who wore a bandana on his nose in public. His heart jumped into his throat when he saw their quiet and kind brown-haired drummer lagging a little bit behind them; his arms were behind his back quietly and he was looking up at the sky in thought. “Kai…” He couldn’t help but let the drummer’s name escape his lips; he panicked and froze in his seat. The first to spot him was Ruki and the look he gave Miyavi would have pierced him to his spot if he wasn’t already frozen in place. Ruki climbed down from his spot on Aoi’s back and made a bee line for Miyavi where he sat. The others in the band were now watching with looks of anger and hatred on their faces. Ruki stopped right in front of Miyavi and crossed his arms, glaring at him. Miyavi looked over to Kai who was now managing to hide behind Uruha. He tore his eyes away from Kai to look into Ruki’s angry ones. He gulped down the lump in his throat as he looked at Ruki, his words leaving him in his panicked state. ‘Shit… Now I’m in for it…’ Miyavi thought to himself as he looked up at Ruki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written in 2009, but I did proofread it. Hopefully I didn't miss anything.


	3. Sadness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruki said Miyavi’s name like he was cursing someone. Miyavi didn’t move, he could swear that he wasn’t even breathing.

Ruki glared down at Miyavi. “ _Miyavi_ …” Ruki said Miyavi’s name like he was cursing someone. Miyavi didn’t move, he could swear that he wasn’t even breathing. “You know, I used to think that you were a nice guy, but boy did you prove me wrong.” Ruki said as he looked at Miyavi with his piercing gaze through his sunglasses. Miyavi sighed. “I didn’t-“ Ruki cut him off as he spoke. “I don’t care what you did or didn’t do! You should have been raised better to know when you’ve really hurt a person. I suggest you don’t come around us or Kai-kun again.” Ruki spoke with certainty. That’s when Kai’s quiet voice came from behind Uruha. “Come on Ruki, just… leave him alone.” Kai’s voice was quiet and hollow, full of hurt and Miyavi felt like shit hearing Kai, once full of love and passion about everything, sounding like he’d lost all will to live. Miyavi felt a pang in his chest. He’d rather Kai be screaming his heart out at him right now then to hear the hurt he’d caused him. God, he felt like such an asshole.

Kai came out from behind Uruha slowly and kept his gaze away from Miyavi, but he could clearly see the hurt written all over Kai’s face. He wished at that moment that he had been in a freak accident and was no longer on this Earth, dead as could be. Yet, here he sat, hated and despised by people that he used to call ‘friends’ and one that was the love of his life. Sure, he loved Melody, but he didn’t love her like he did Kai. There was just pure _chemistry_ between Kai and himself. He fidgeted in his seat, the thick silence between everyone weighing down on his soul greatly. He stood up, wanting to wrap his arms around Kai and apologize, no _grovel_ at Kai’s feet, but he knew that even if he did that Kai would still be hurt and there was nothing he could do to make it less painful.

Miyavi stood there clenching and unclenching his fists at his sides, gathering his words in his throat. “Ruki, I know nothing I say will make you stop hating me, but I really do love Kai…” Miyavi spoke honestly, quickly gathering his things and leaving before anyone could say something more that would make him feel even more like shit. Just then, his phone started ringing and he knew by the ringtone that it was Melody. He pulled out his phone and answered it, putting on his Bluetooth as he did so. “Hey Mel, what’s wrong?” He spoke into the phone quietly, trying to clear his head of his bad mood. Melody spoke quietly and smoothly, like she always did. “Hey honey, would you mind grabbing dinner while you’re out? I don’t feel like cooking tonight.” Melody was in a good mood and he could tell. “Sure thing, Melody. Just give me a little while and I’ll be home.” Miyavi replied with a small smile on his face. “Okay, I’ll be at my place. Just come over when you’re done.” She replied kindly. Miyavi nodded and said his good-byes to her. Once he had hung up, he stopped into a small store to use the restroom. Once in the bathroom, he ran cold water in the sink and splashed his face with it. He wiped at his face with a paper towel and leaned his forehead against the glass of the mirror; Ruki’s words had been replaying in his head for a while now.  _“You should have been raised better to know when you’ve really hurt a person…”_ Miyavi couldn’t help it, and the tears that he’d been holding back streamed down his face accompanied by his quiet sobs.


	4. Complications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now what was he to do? He could apologize to Kai, but now he’d never be able to be with Kai ever again. He felt like he was adrift in a world of complications rather than solutions.

Miyavi walked into Melody’s apartment about an hour later. Melody was bustling about the place, going through clothes and picking up what little mess there was. Miyavi called out to the apartment as he shut the door, “Tadaima.” Melody smiled to herself as she heard her boyfriend calling out to her. “Miyavi, honey~, welcome home. What did you get to eat?” She said as she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. Miyavi smiled down at her. “I just stopped at this really good Italian restaurant on the way back. Hope you like Italian.” Miyavi replied with a smile to her. Melody nodded her head yes and went to the kitchen to grab some plates and utensils for them to eat with. She placed them at the kitchen table while Miyavi unpacked the food from the bag. Once they had sat down at the table and were eating, Melody decided to ask Miyavi how his day had been.

He swallowed the lump that formed in his throat, trying to keep the sadness from showing on his face. “It was relatively fuss-free… how about yours?” He replied, directing the conversation in a less painful direction. Melody smiled at him as she spoke. “Well, I found out something special today. Do you want to know what it is?” She said to him with a playful glint in her eyes. Miyavi frowned in thought at what it could be and nodded his head in an earnest yes. Melody’s face lit up and she had this huge smile on her pretty face as she gathered her words. “Miyavi, I’m pregnant.” Melody spoke the words with such emotion that Miyavi seemed to freeze for the second time that day. “Y-You’re what?” He said confusedly, in a state of shock. Melody smiled at him. “Just what I said, I’m pregnant.” She repeated with a loving smile on her face. Miyavi felt like everything around him was crashing down upon him.

Miyavi managed to make it through dinner without incident, and managed to leave her apartment to go back to his own in a bit of a daze. Now what was he to do? He could apologize to Kai, but now he’d never be able to be with Kai ever again. He had to do the right thing and stay with her no matter what. After all, he was going to be a father soon and that required him to be there to help with the baby and be a good father. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair in thought as to what was going to become of him now. He felt like he was adrift in a world of complications rather than solutions.

 

* * *

 

After Ruki had berated Miyavi in public, he had gone back with Aoi to his apartment in a very frustrated mood. Ruki just couldn’t believe that Miyavi would do such a thing to Kai of all people; they had been so in love, or so it had appeared. Aoi sighed as he watched Ruki flop down onto the couch with a long sigh coming from his luscious lips. “Ru baby, stop fretting over it so much. I’m sure that Miyavi will do the right thing when it comes down to it. I mean, he has honor in his blood, so he _has_ to do the right thing, no?” Aoi said as he walked over to the couch and sat down beside Ruki, handing him a beer as he did so. Ruki took the beer and sighed as he opened it and took a long sip from it. “Aoi, I don’t know if he will or not. He shows no signs of being sorry for what he’s done to Kai and Kai is slowly tearing apart at the seams. I mean, he was late the other day to practice. Kai, _late_ … it just doesn’t happen… _EVER._ ” Ruki said to Aoi as he placed his beer on the coffee table.

Aoi nodded and took a thoughtful sip of his beer before he decided to answer to what Ruki had said. “I don’t know, Ruki. Maybe Miyavi is stuck with this Melody girl for reasons we don’t know.” Aoi replied quietly as he placed his beer onto the table. Ruki scoffed at Aoi’s words. “Yeah, just like he was ‘stuck’ with her while he was taking poor Kai’s heart? I doubt that, Aoi, I mean-“ Ruki’s words were cut off as Aoi placed his lips against Ruki’s in a gentle and passionate kiss. Aoi pulled back and smiled at the blissful look on Ruki’s face. “Better?” Aoi asked Ruki with a gentle smile. Ruki nodded happily with a loving smile up at Aoi.

 


	5. Frustration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was going to be a father soon and that required him to be there to help with the baby and be a good father. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair in thought as to what was going to become of him now.

Miyavi ended up outside of Kai’s apartment late at night. He hadn’t even realized that was where he was headed until he got there. He felt foolish and stupid and all those other emotions one feels when they’ve wronged a person greatly. He fidgeted where he stood, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. His palms had become sweaty and he could hear his heart beating in his ears. He raised a hand to knock, but stopped himself as he heard movement inside the apartment.

His heart stopped beating for a few seconds and he fled the scene before the door opened and Kai popped his head out. “Hello?” Kai questioned out into the darkness as he looked around. The light on his porch didn’t help him because he saw no one. He could have sworn that he’d heard someone outside of his door. He walked over to the end of the balcony and popped his head over. Kai didn’t see anyone or anything in sight. He sighed and shook his head at himself as he walked back into the apartment.

Miyavi sighed as he walked out from behind a cement post down from Kai’s apartment. He felt like a complete idiot, but he didn’t know what to do or even say. ‘Hi Kai; I’m really sorry for what I did and now Melody is pregnant and I don’t know what to do and I don’t even know if the kid is mine because I don’t remember having sex with her and I’m just so damn confused!!!’ Yeah, that would go well… Miyavi rolled his eyes at himself and walked off, having a strong urge to have a cigarette. Miyavi surprised himself in wanting a cigarette and just decided to go home and work out some to fight off the urge. He’d punish his body for wanting a cigarette and, ultimately, what he’d done to Kai.

 

* * *

 

Uruha laid his body down gently into the bed beside Reita. Reita had gone to bed way before Uruha had; Uruha had decided to stay up and have some wine while he watched whatever program he had been watching on TV. Reita grunted as he felt Uruha’s body slip in beside him in bed. “I was wondering when you would come to bed already.” Reita said with a small sigh as he turned himself around to face Uruha. Uruha had a kind and apologetic smile on his face. “I’m sorry, Reirei. I thought that you were asleep. I was trying to be good and quiet.” Uruha said with a pout on his face. Reita chuckled at Uruha. “I was asleep about two hours ago, but I woke up because I can never sleep without you in the bed too, you know.” Reita said with a smile to Uruha as he moved some hair from Uruha’s face gently. Uruha smiled down at Reita, leaning in and capturing Reita’s lips in a deep kiss.

Reita smiled up at Uruha as Uruha caressed Reita’s cheek lovingly. “You know, if only the world could see you for who you truly are. Then, the world would see how amazing you can truly be, Reita.” Uruha said to Reita lovingly and gently with a gentle light dancing in his golden brown eyes. Reita smiled up at Uruha. “Yeah, but then I wouldn’t be just yours anymore.” Reita replied with a smirk on his face. Uruha’s face scrunched up in thought and then he frowned. “On second thought, forget what I just said. I want you to be mine and _only_ mine.” Uruha replied with a chuckle as he wrapped his arms around Reita and pulled him close.

 

 


	6. Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was one thing on Miyavi’s mind as he rode the train to Kai’s apartment with Ruki: Where in the hell are you, Kai?!

Miyavi was awakened the next day by a pounding at his front door. He sighed and got up, stretching as he did so and wondering when he had fallen asleep on the couch. He shrugged away his wondering and went to the door and looked through the peep hole. He was confused to see a set of brown spikes in the view. He unlocked and opened the door to find Ruki in his doorway. “R-Ruki?” Miyavi said, rather confused as to why the person who seemed to hate him the most was in his doorway. Ruki didn’t say anything and went into Miyavi’s apartment. Miyavi stood in his doorway a little shocked, but shut the door. “Umm… Ruki, can I help you with something?” Miyavi said as he watched Ruki go around his apartment, searching every inch of the place. Ruki disappeared into the bedrooms and rooms of his apartment while Miyavi stood there more than a little confused.

Miyavi scratched at his head and tried to gather his thoughts. “Ruki, you know this is kind of an invasion of my privacy…” Miyavi spoke as he heard Ruki going through drawers in his bedroom. Ruki emerged shortly after to get right up in Miyavi’s face. “Where the fuck is he?!” Ruki demanded, more than pissed as it seemed. Miyavi looked into Ruki’s intense eyes very confusedly. “What-? Who are you talking-?” Miyavi’s sentence was cut off by Ruki. “You know who I’m talking about so cut the crap and tell me! We’re all fucking worried sick!” Ruki spat out his words at Miyavi who got even more confused by what Ruki said. “Ruki, I truly don’t know who you’re talking about…” Miyavi replied, as he looked down into Ruki’s fiery gaze. Ruki searched Miyavi’s eyes for any trace of a lie and saw that Miyavi was indeed telling the truth.

Ruki sighed as he let Miyavi’s shirt go, Miyavi wondering when he’d even grabbed his shirt, and went over to Miyavi’s couch and sat down. Ruki put his face in his hands and let out a sad sigh. Miyavi went over beside Ruki and sat down. “Ruki, you have to tell me what’s going on.” Miyavi said as he looked over at the other’s brown spiked head. Ruki sighed as he rubbed at his eyes before he looked up at Miyavi. “It’s Kai… We don’t know where he is. He didn’t leave any note saying that he was going anywhere and it looks as if he’s just vanished.” Ruki said as he fidgeted with his rings. “I had hoped that maybe he was here or that you might have something to do with it…” Ruki replied rather quietly and sadly. Miyavi sat there, shocked at what Ruki had just said. He stood up and looked down at Ruki. “How about we go over to Kai’s apartment and we’ll see if maybe we can figure out where he went.” Miyavi said as he looked down at Ruki. Ruki nodded his head yes; Miyavi rushed back to his bedroom where he threw on some clothes and brushed his hair and teeth before he rushed out of his apartment with Ruki in tow, heading to Kai’s apartment. There was one thing on Miyavi’s mind as he rode the train to Kai’s apartment with Ruki: _Where in the hell are you, Kai?!_


	7. Nostalgia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He sighed, feeling nostalgic at looking at the picture, but that’s when it hit him.

When Miyavi and Ruki arrived at Kai’s apartment, the rest of the band was already there and inside searching. Ruki entered the apartment first, but Miyavi was tentative on whether he should enter or not. I mean, they did _all_ hate him for being such an ass. Ruki stopped when he realized that Miyavi had stopped right outside of the doorway. Ruki turned around and walked out of the apartment and up to Miyavi. “What? Don’t you want to come in and help us find him?” Ruki asked Miyavi quietly and confusedly. Miyavi sighed and fidgeted with his hands. “It’s-It’s not that… It’s the fact that you all hate me and that I haven’t been in his apartment since we-we-we stopped going out... I don’t know if I can handle it now knowing that he’s missing…” Miyavi said as he looked down into Ruki’s eyes sadly. Ruki sighed and ran a hand through his own hair. “Miyavi… we are pissed off at you, but it’s not the time to be thinking about these things. We need to keep our focus on Kai and only Kai.” Ruki said as he placed a firm hand on Miyavi’s shoulder.

Miyavi nodded as he looked at Ruki. Ruki gave Miyavi a small smile and they went into the apartment together. It didn’t take long for everyone to split up and go around Kai’s apartment in different rooms to look for clues. They all went over every square inch of Kai’s apartment, Miyavi in the bedroom, Ruki in the bathroom, Aoi in the living room, Reita in the kitchen, and Uruha in the spare bedroom and music room. No one had found a thing; Miyavi was getting discouraged and sat down on the bed, looking around the room and trying to think and see what Kai might have. That’s when his eyes landed on a picture that was a little out of place in Kai’s bedroom. It was a picture of himself and Kai where they had taken a trip and were waiting for their plane to Germany. They had a passerby take a picture of them while they were sitting together; they both looked so happy and had huge smiles on their faces. He sighed, feeling nostalgic at looking at the picture, but that’s when it hit him.

Miyavi got up and rushed out of the house, leaving everyone to figure out what was happening and trying to chase after him. Aoi was keeping up with him rather well, but he was no match for Miyavi’s long legs and soon was out of stride and out of breath. Aoi couldn’t help but call after Miyavi to try to get him to stop. “Miyavi! WAIT, WHERE ARE YOU GOING!?” Aoi yelled out after the running man. Miyavi didn’t stop, he just called back to answer Aoi, “I have an idea on where Kai might be! I’ll call and let you guys know if I found him!” Miyavi ran as far as he could and caught a taxi to take him to the airport.

* * *

 

It wasn’t long before the taxi pulled up to Tokyo’s airport and Miyavi scrambled out. He paid the driver quickly and took off running. He pushed through the people, getting frustrated as he kept getting caught up by the many hordes of people in the airport and around it. People were getting pissed off at him and giving him looks that said, ‘What in the hell is wrong with you? Just calm down, stupid!’ Miyavi paid them no mind as he went into the airport and looked around. ‘Good god, there are so many damn people here right now.’ Miyavi thought as he looked around through the hordes of people. He scanned the area, remembering what it was like when he had been here with Kai that day; they had both been so excited about going on their spur-of-the-moment trip.

Miyavi looked around, fighting his way through the crowds of people and making his way through the airport slowly. That’s when he spotted Kai in line to get onto a plane. He was just three people away from getting his ticket and passport taken and checked out. “Kai!!!” Miyavi called out to him as he waited in line. Kai was taken aback by his name being called and wheeled around. Kai quickly spotted Miyavi as he made his way through the crowd and Kai stopped. Miyavi was about twenty feet away from Kai and they were now both just staring at each other.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this back in 2009. I have of course gone back and proofread and fixed any errors. Luckily it's actually a chapter fic that I finished so that's a huge bonus. Yay. :D Anyways, comments and kudos are love!


End file.
